Wrestling Headlines from Last Weekend (11/4-11/5)

 

Pull on this!
Zahid whips out a victory in a 3-2 thriller over Hall.

Yes, Massa’
Logan disenfranchises opponents at the Michigan State Open.

(And yes, it’s ok to be insensitive to the brutal institution of American chattel slavery—that the South pathetically fought to preserve—because it’s a Trump, Trump World)

We Hard-Lee Knew Ya. 
Brock Zacherl welcomes Nick Lee to Division 1 Wrestling; I welcome myself to the art of plagiarism.

Piccinnini Cruzes to 8-5 Victory
Darian Cruz left Picc-ing a tent. No, not that kind of pun, Cruz is literally on the street pitching a tent… because he’s a bum.

‘Boo!’ 
Lewallan scares off the 149-pound room competition at the OCU Open, beats every Stillwater Moran.

Take a Chance on Him
Marsteller dismantles bracket– credits bold, new strategy of taking on opponents one at a time. BAC found to be Pat Duggan’s wrestling career (0.0)

Hey, Princeton! Maybe it’s Time for a Medical School
No vaccine to prevent Ohio State champions in Princeton, New Jersey.

Gable Dan!
Rylee “Not Owings Larry” Streifel proves no match for HS stud, turns in transfer papers Monday morning.

Red, White, and ‘Blue Ox’
Chad Red, Isaiah White, and Mikey Labriola turn in strong performances for the young Nebraska Cornhuskers at the Daktroniks Open.

That S**T Cray
Rutgers fans applaud Nick Suriano as he murders College Park resident, Brandon Cray. Cray’s list of 2016-2017 accomplishments includes twice beating Penn State’s presumed starter, Devin Schnupp. Suriano is rumored to request a Manslaughter waiver from the Big 10. Cray was 20 years old.

This entry was posted in Headlines. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.